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Tuesday, August 2 2005

Vocal Nodules

…are apparently no big deal, and that’s basically what I’ve got. They’re like callouses on your vocal chords, tiny little dots that prevent my chords from fully closing, the way other people’s, those with proper speech patterning, chords would close. I don’t need surgery, as I would have to have if I had polyps, and the only thing the doctor recommended was seeing a speech therapist. So tomorrow, instead of immediately making an appointment with a speech therapist (and I’m actively looking for a good one) I’m going to an ayurvedic doctor who will do a full body scan and not take my insurance, but I’ll feel more new-agey and healthy after hearing what she has to say. I’ve been to more doctors in the past few weeks than most people want to see in a year, and now I think I’ve achieved full-blown hypochondriac status. But I don’t feel so hypo, since really, I do have some nodules on my vocal chords. My nose is numb because the doctor shot some numbing agent up both nostrils so that he could stick some long needle like thing with a camera up the end up my nose and down the back of my throat. I am always amazed at how our bodies function and how are nose and throat are really connected. Plus, I got to see my vocal chords in action, and that was pretty trippy in and of itself.

Whew..I’m exhausted from writing a paragraph about my trip to the doctor. He also told me to stay hydrated, which is something I’ve been doing naturally all summer, but still, I sometimes wonder - how much water is too much? I’ve heard, and recently read, that you can drink too much water, and in turn, you can die from drinking too much water. I try to drink between 8 and 16 glasses a day, and I’m not sure if 16 means I’m going overboard or not. At what point does water flush all the nutrients out of your system, and/or kill you? *if there really is a point at all

Oh, I should pre-promote….I’m going to be on the Derek and Romaine show on Sirius Radio this Friday night at 8:15. There is no set topic, but last time I was on I had a blast, and this time I’m sure it will be just as much fun. I want to come armed with some outrageous topics to discuss, so if you can think of any, sexually speaking of course, then email me and let me know. And then listen if you can. It’s on Sirius Radio’s OutQ channel. And then email them and tell them I deserve my own show. And then send them money bribing them to give me my own show. And then offer to lavish them with gifts if they give me my own show. And then call them asking why I don’t have my own show. And then..okay, I’ll shut up now. since resting my voice is a good way to help keep my vocal nodules in check.

I was reading a piece in Town and Country, a magazine I’ve never read before, but someone passed on this large piece they did on sexuality for me to read, and it said that women on the pill tend to have lower sex drives because the pill does something to our testosterone levels. I don’t understand how this works, as my sex drive is really high and always has been. Do you think I should be worried? Or should I just be worried about the fact that last month I got my period while I was still taking my last week of “active” pills and had no period during the placebo period, and this month the same thing seems to be happening? I need a good gyno in New York. I don’t think the woman I’m using right now really cares about me. Heck, since I’m paying at least $200 to go to the ayurvedic doctor tomorrow, I might as well ask her…milk her for all she’s worth, if you know what I mean…

But really, how often does anybody really know what another person means?

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