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Monday, September 15 2008

Airline Porn Poo-Pooed by Professionals

Photo Credit: Bambangenator

Jaunted reports that American Airlines, upon their introduction of free! wi-fi! while you fly! has been receiving shitola from the Association of Professional Flight Attendants (which should not be confused with the Association of Unprofessional Flight Attendants, as these are people who just like to play flight attendant, and are not actually certified to serve you peanuts and get you an extra pillow if they so happen to even have pillows on your flight) about the predilection some passengers may have to view free, or not-so-free, online porn that comes with free! wi-fi! while you fly!

Fine, I may not want to find myself next to some overexcited Hasidic man who happens to be watching a porno of two cows doing it with a lady in a field in France, but it’s silly to think that with, or without, the Internet people can’t, or don’t, watch porn on a plane. I mean even if you bar “porn sites” from the friendly skies, you can still slip a disc in your computer, or portable electronic device, and watch as much gosh-darn porn as you’d fucking like as you fly. Well, or as much porn as you can watch before you battery dies, unless of course you happen to be on a flight that has plugs under your feet (thanks Virgin).

So, whether or not you can actually stream porn through the AA webserver or not, the Association of Professional Flight Attendants can’t stop porn from making its way on a plane. They can, however, refuse to serve you soda and a snack. Of course, by blocking said “pornography” you may also limit people from visiting other sites that aren’t porn, but sites that may be deemed “too hot to handle.” Heck, I can’t even log on to my site from some bigger chain sandwich/coffee shops, but alas, I’ve lived without wifi while flying for this long, I can live without going to certain sites when I fly.

Besides, I’ve actually watched porn on a plane before..and no one has stopped me. So just be smart about it. Even if you fly with your own porn, don’t wank off in your seat. Go to the bathroom and wank off quickly. While listening to the realistic ooohs and ahhs of your favorite startlet, be considerate to other passengers and wear headphones. And make sure nobody else has to watch what turns you on. Unless, of course, they ask to.

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