There’s no way to guarantee perfection in a condom, especially since it all depends on the machine known as human being who’s controlling its fit, form and function, but earlier this month Consumer Reports beat up, and blew up, 20 different models (and bought 15,000 condoms) to see how strong they actually are. One Durex, Two Lifestyles and Four Trojan Condoms topped the list while Night Light’s Glow in the Dark condom should be avoided lest you want to be someone called mommy or daddy in the not-to-distant future.

The video, while cheesy (my favorite way to be!) shows you just what goes on when testing condoms. No condoms are actually physically tested by two human bodies in the heat of the moment, but the things that machines can do to condoms are pretty impressive. Since I hate the sound of popping balloons, I can’t say I’ve ever blown up a condom until it has exploded, but now I’m sure that big packages can fit inside a little latex or polyurethane.

And here’s their blog post about condom testing too!