I teach a lot of classes about going down on penis, and thought it time to share some of the most important things about giving good head. It’s not only about technique, although technique is important when you get down to it.
1. You have to want to be there. If you’re not into what you’re doing, or who you’re doing it to, don’t do it. That’s the bottom line. Any guy will be able to tell if you’re not that into it, and if you lack the enthusiasm and commitment giving head entails then find some other activity that makes you happy. The person doing the giving needs to get pleasure out of providing pleasure. Otherwise, don’t go there.
2. Eye contact. You don’t need to gaze into each others eyes from the moment you start till the moment you finish, but you should make lots of eye contact before you begin to just bob up and down. It’s also nice to take breaks to look at your partner in all his glory (and this gives you a chance to rest your jaw). In the beginning, place light kisses on the tip of his penis while you look him in the eyes. Suck on his balls (again, lightly) and stare back up at him while you tease the stepchildren. When he’s finishing up, watch his facial expressions as he lets go, and enjoy getting him off. There’s no right time to look at your partner, it’s more that it feels right to do so.
3. Spit is lube. In fact it’s the most natural lube you’ve got. You don’t have to make like a porn star and hock a loogie, but you can still use a good amount of spit to soak his shaft and maneuver his manhood. All you need to do is gather saliva and then go down on his penis while your own wetness is pooled in your mouth. No need to spit or get sloppy, although trust me, he’ll like the visual.
4. C’mon feel the noise. Men like noise. They want to hear how much you like sucking on their big, bad boner so don’t hold back if you feel the urge to moan. Let it out, but try not to fake it. The more sounds you can muster, the more you’ll sound like your in the mood. For added value when you take a break, look him in they eyes while you move your hand up and down his rod and tell him how hot you are for him and how good he feels when in your mouth.
5. Tease him. Don’t go down and start bopping right away. Before you head for the finish line, enjoy the beginning bits. Take his flaccid penis in your mouth and suck on it like it’s a jolly rancher (cherry’s my favorite flavor). Kiss the tip of his penis, the inner thigh right around the balls (you can lift these babies to get further back). Lick around the head, and definitely check out the frenulum, the place where the head meets the shaft on the underside of the penis. On circumcised guys it’s easy to spot the “V” shape.
6. Warmth. Moisture. Pressure. From here on out known as WMP. These are really the keys to a blow job. Remember this and you’ll be on top of your game.
7. Teeth or no teeth. Okay, so most guides/people will tell you to never use teeth when you’re giving a BJ. Honestly, you should never use teeth when giving a BJ until you know that your man likes a little light skimming. Some guys find teeth scraping against their dicks a turn on, which doesn’t mean you want to bite, it means you want to lightly tease his penis with your teeth. But before you skim your pearly whites on his prick, ask him if he’s into it, and then proceed with caution.
8. Ice, ice baby. Ice or a warm cup of water can change the temperature of your mouth on his cock. At least for a few seconds. So make sure to surprise him with a different mood every once in a while.
9. Hey honey. Drizzle a little honey around his penis and taste the difference. Honey’s thick, and sticky, but if you work at it long enough it will completely melt in your mouth, not on your man. Make sure not to use whip cream, unless you wash it all off before (and if) you’re going to have intercourse. Whip cream is made of oil and that can break down a condom. Besides warm dairy on skin is gross when you think about it?
10. The Million Dollar Spot. This is the spot between his ass and his balls. The area, known as the taint - yes that’s taint your ass, taint your balls, is technically called the perineum. Go there when he’s ready to explode. That means a minute or two before orgasm, head behind the balls. Feel for an indent, it’s about an inch behind the balls. Press that indent, with the pad of your fingertip when he’s about to come, and see if he likes it. You can just apply pressure right where you are, or stroke back and forth or in little circles. You may have to move a little bit farther back to hit his million dollar spot, because everybody’s a little different. But on all guys the spot grants you access to his prostate without having to go in his butt. This is something you’ll need to figure out as you press and play.
11. Foreskin is your friend. If you’re guy’s still fully intact use that foreskin as a masturbation toy. Move it up and down while you focus on his head or give him a hand job with his extra protection. Just remember he’s more sensitive than a man without that thin layer of extra skin.
12. Deep Throat. Was a movie that came out in 1973 starring Linda Lovelace. Her character was born with her clitoris in her throat so the only way she could get off was by deep throating dick. Unless your clit is in your throat too, you don’t have to deep throat. Of course you can if you want to, are potentially curious about it, or get off on doing it. If you want to go there, just remember to breathe. Sit in a position that allows you to be in alignment (that’s how a sword swallower does it) which means sitting up with a straight back or standing and let him come into your mouth. Stick your tongue out as far as you can to get more in. Practice when brushing your teeth. Take the toothbrush and move a bit farther back on your tongue each time you brush. Don’t forget that you’re gag reflex is a good thing, which leads me to…
13. Gagging. If you gag he probably thinks that his dick is so big you can’t take him all in. This makes him happy. And don’t you want to make him happy? Seriously, gagging is fine unless it makes you throw up (and unless throwing up is your thing), so don’t worry if you do it. It happens to the best of us. Just remember to relax, breathe and enjoy whatever you’re doing.
To be continued…