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Monday, June 1 2009

Professionally Personal

I have a hard time deciphering when to get personal on this blog, and when to keep it 100% above board professional. When I started writing, back in 2003, it was to stay in touch with my family and friends out east while I ventured for a ridiculously short time - and wild ride - out west. But now that isn’t the point of the blog anymore, and over the last week and a half, truth be told, I haven’t been quite able to figure out what the point of a lot of pointy things are.

I’m going to get personal here because anyone who knows me knows I’m a TMI kind of girl, the one who tells you things you never needed to know, and secretly, or not so secretly, might even masturbate too.

I don’t think you’ll masturbate to this though. That’s because all I want to say is that I’ve had a hard time finding a way to figure out how to stay motivated online. For a while I experimented with facebook updates, constantly changing what I was doing to see what would happen. But last week, while hiking in the ridiculously gorgeous mountains of Maine, I had an epiphany. I re-realized my life isn’t any more important than anyone else’s and whether I went with the soy latte or the hot chocolate doesn’t affect you. So I’m not experimenting on facebook anymore. Of course, that’s not that big of an epiphany and I’m kind of hypocritical, because I’m still getting personal right now..and I still do tweet.

Still, for the last week and a half I’ve been neglecting this blog. I’m in the process of rebuilding my life, the one that I live when I’m not typing on my computer. And so, as it slowly rebuilds and rearranges itself, I think about what else is being rebuilt. I left my relationship, an important friendship, my cat who was more like a son than any son I’ve never had, and I’ve moved out of my home and am trying to move on with my life.

And I hate that people like Dr. Tiller, who take a stand on abortion get shot down in their own house of worship. And someone else choosing to kill you for what you do, for not agreeing with you, that sucks big time.

That kind of puts it all back in perspective. I have choice. I’m alive, and I can keep fighting the good fight for positive sexuality education and information. And so I will, and I have, but for the last week and a half I’ve needed time. But now, I need to get back. To the professional. To the personal. To life, love and 101 sex positions.

And so I carry on. We all do, right?

Tell Me You Love Me


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