For the following few Friday’s I’ll be posting a holiday gift idea that you’d most likely never want to buy, but that I, for some reason, can’t stop staring at. Today’s pick is the fabulous reindeer thong for his schlong.

My favorite part of the picture is the star covering the piece o’ scrotal sac that would otherwise be apparently available for viewing under his reindeer nose (uhm, hello, photoshop).  And while he’s not Rudolph the red-scholonged reindeer, this reindeer definitely has a big nose, which leads me to think that maybe he’s really a Jewish reindeer parading as a symbol of Christmas in order to make some extra cash. Plus, special shout out to the antlers, which I suppose are great for tickling his mound-of-love while he gyrates his hunk o’ burning deerskin.

Yeah, elongated g-strings are best left to the Chippendales, but guys, if ever you were going to play stripper for the holidays, please, please, PLEASE pick the reindeer to protect your penis.

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For more ridiculous gift ideas visit The Frisky’s 21 Sexy Christmas Presents That Are Just Wrong.