July 27, 2021

Peer Unions


There are so many places to go today. Walking here this morning, yes on the dawn of one of the hottest days of summer, I had one of those "only in New York" moments. First I walked over the East River and I was offered the best breeze on this side of Manhattan Island, okay, I don't know that for sure, but it was the best breeze I felt all day, and then I walked through some major motion picture filming at Schiller's on the Lower East Side, and then I passed a large group of 'movers' - men lugging heavy furniture out of some expensive apartment in the East Village. And then I passed NYU where things are mellow in the summer, although there are always students around. And then it was up towards the heart of midtown where suits and ties are as common as well, the corporate people wearing them.

I've been told I to look corporate today. Must be the flourescent lights.

My friend Andy wrote this really heartfelt piece about bisexuality for Nerve.com. I recommend reading it, and then if you still have time, read this. It's a great piece on how men are really turned on by porn (in response to that NY Times piece, "Gay, Straight or Lying?".)

Speaking of reading, In this month's Contemporary Sexuality, a magazine put out by AASECT (American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists) there's an interesting article that defines a term for me, a term that many others may have heard about, but to mean it sounds sort of new. It's called Peer Marriage.

"Couples who are not highly conflictual, who describe their relationship as very satisfying, and who consider one another best friends," have peer marriages. According to Dr. Pepper Schwartz, these are "marriages of equal companions, a collaboration of love and labor in order to produce profound intimacy and mutual respect."

This is what we all want on some level, no? So, there, now it's nicely labelled and laid out, just the way we Americans like our lives. While there is a hint of sarcasm in my thoughts, it's really quite true and perfect. At least, it's the kind of relationship I want. I'm going to change the term to "peer unions" but still, it works. It really works.

Posted by jamye at July 27, 2021 11:36 AM