I am leaving town in less than two hours to go watch - and listen to - the man who I once wished would sire my children. Now he's married (for the second time), and he's got too many kids of his own, and I'm happy in my relationship. In other words, I don't need him anymore - and not in a bitter sort of way. Besides, I'm no Laura Dern, I didn't have a mad crazy relationship with Billy Bob, and I'm not tall and blonde and really, really thin..
Still, I am getting on a bus, and heading out of town to go hear Ben Harper tonight. In Philadelphia, where I'll meet up with one of my closest friends and where I'll get to pine over my lost love (if only he knew what he could have had). But then again, if Ben and I had actually been given the opportunity to fall in love, I probably wouldn't be writing this blog, as he wouldn't want me blabbering about our personal life and our life on the road. And, I'd be taking care of the children and being a stage wife, and probably doing less to further my career as a sex educator. And I wouldn't be in New York enough to be President of Feminists for Free Expression. And I probably wouldn't be designing my website, which yes, is really happening...and I definitely wouldn't have met my lover boy, and over time, that might have made me sad...
but who knows..I might have been really, really happy, and it might have felt good to have millions of women pining over my man, although, on second thought, I've had to deal with a few women having crushes on my boyfriend and I don't handle it well at all. I don't like it one bit. SO maybe this whole thing, this Ben Harper dream, it's just better that way.
Still, I get to hear him sing and strum tonight. I am one lucky girl.
Posted by jamye at July 28, 2021 04:37 PM